A 5 R 5….

A 5 R 5
This title appears to be cryptic,no? Somewhat like Shahrukh Khan’s forthcoming movie named Ra1 ?
No,no,its not so difficult.Well A stands for AJIT and R stands for RAJNIKANTH.An odd combination you will say ! Wait a while please.
Yes I am talking of late Ajit,the sauve and sophisticated villain of Hindi movies in the 70s to late 90s.His style of dialogue delivery and his famous punchlines from various films are still remembered by his fans and there are several websites where many famous and lively Ajit Jokes are listed and enjoyed by lovers of this actor ! I belong to the list of his fans.His dialogues:”Mona darling, Smart Boy, Lilly don’t be silly, Mona loot lo sona “, went on to become a rage and they sometimes overshadowed his earlier remarkable performances.I still remember some of his other famous catch-phrases from some of his movies: Sara shehar mujhe Loyan (Lion) ke naam se janata hai,What’s your problem?” ” I lost my glasses” ” How very interesting..”.After his death in 1998,there has been no other villain like Ajit, I feel. 

Recently, Rajnikanth has also become an equally famous cult figure,I feel,especially after his super hit movie named:”Robot – Endhiran” rang up the box office cash registers.His fans were in a state of frenzy,as it were, after seeing his stunts and action scenes in that film.I now see a parallel there since there are also several fan clubs of Rajnikanth and quite a few web sites are also devoted to jokes about his dare devilery, bravado and super human qualities.

So to come back to the title of this piece,I will now list 5 of my most favourite jokes on Ajit and 5 of the most popular jokes on Rajnikanth.I believe that if Ajit was an institution,Rajnikanth has the capacity to make you laughingly insane and send you to a mental asylum or an institution for mad-caps like me.I would like to clarify that I have no intention to offend any fans of these two gentlemen please ! Jokes are to be treated as Jokes and not be stretched so far as to convey as if I am offending these two stars ! OK ?
A 5  first :
1.Scene   :  Ajeet thoroughly disgusted with Mona
                    daaa..arrling’s typing.
    Ajeet    : 
Raaberrt, Mona ke dono hathon ko
                     kaat do.
  Raabert  : 
Magar kyoon Baas ?
    Ajeet    : 
Typing to nahi atee, kamsekam  
                     shaarthand to  seekh legi.
2.Scene   :  Ajeet comes to know about the traitor
                     in his gang. 
Ajeet        :  Raabert, ise ShamePain mein daal
                    do, agar  Shame se nahi mara to
                    Pain se mar jayega.

3.Ajeet     :  Raabert ! isko eraser se maar do,

                     yeh mar bhi jayega aur mit bhi
4.Raabert : Boss? Is kaa kyaa kare boss?
    : Raabert ! Is pille ko liquid oxygen
                    me daal do. Liquid ise jeene nahi
                    dega, aur oxygen ise  marne nahi
5.Scene    : Ajeet ordering his chela to kill the
     Ajeet    : “Raabert, Ise varnish mein daal do,
                      saala mar bhi jaayega aur finish bhi
                      aa jaayegi.
R 5 next :

1.When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn’t lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
2.Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes. 
3.Rajinikanth doesn’t breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
4.Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.
5.Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated. 
PS : You may have your own list of your favourite lokes on these two institutions,so in case you would like to share them, go ahead and respond,at your own risk and consequences ! 

Hope you must have enjoyed these jokes as much as I enjoyed posting them.So laugh away your blues dearies !!

This entry was posted in Humour, Movies & Entertainmaint, Nostalgia, People. Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to A 5 R 5….

  1. puttu kulkarni says:

    Fantastic imagination. I was/am a fan of Ajit. Anyhow, Rajanikant is our man.

    Puttu Kulkarni, Melinakeri-Hegde-581 330 Kumta
    Nov 11, 2010

  2. kalyani kapur says:

    Had a great laugh on this. Thanks for sharing.

    Kalyani Kapur, Gurgaon
    Nov 11, 2010

  3. ramesh anand says:

    Superb, Broca Sir. Recently, I completed reading his biography” The Name Is Rajinikanth”. This one, I heard recently: If Rajnikanth hits you, even google cannot find you. If Rajnikanth lifts his leg, Earth will lose balance. If Rajnikanth utters a punch dialogue, Villain will punch himself 100 times.

    Ramesh Anand, Malaysia
    Nov 11, 2010

  4. J S Broca says:

    Dear Puttu ji,thanks a lot for your response. Welcome to Ajit Fan Club. Yes Rajnikanth may be your man but now he has crossed all states & become famous here in the North too. Log onto :http://seeingwithc.org/jsblog to see the pictures and post your comments there too.Here is a bonus for you,Puttu: Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald’s, and got it. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

    J S BROCA, New Delhi
    Nov 11, 2010

  5. shernaz says:

    Jatinder,you surely know how to keep the fun factor alive in your posts.
    Here is one on Rajnikanth from my side :
    Spider man,Superman,Batman,James Bond, Ironman, Shaktiman and Krish
    all visited Rajnikanth. Do you know which day it was? . . GURU PURNIMA!

    Shernaz, Pune
    Nov 11th 2010

  6. J S Broca says:

    Dear Kalyani ji ,
    I am glad the post brought some smiles on your face.
    Here is another one on Rajni; a friend just sms-ed it to me :
    The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until
    Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off.
    Yet one more on Ajit too :Scene:Ajeet spots one of his is enemies…
    Ajeet: Maikal, woh jo admi ghadi pahne tumhe nazar aa rahaa hai,
    woh hamara mehman hai.Tum ja kar uske doosre hath mein bhee
    gadhi pehna do…phir woh do ghadi ka mehman ho jayega !

    J S Broca
    new delhi
    11th nov 2010

  7. J S Broca says:

    Dear Ramesh, thanks for your response and some lively Rajnikanth-ers. I must read his autobiography for sure now! Here is one a student of mine e-mailed me a while ago: If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google, it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Rajanikanth?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.” Great, simply great is our Rajnikanth!

    J S BROCA, New Delhi
    Nov 12, 2010

  8. raja ramachandran says:

    Sometime abbreviations like A5 give wrong signals. When I was young, our family was residing at No: 1, Akbar Sahib Street, Triplicane, Madras for more than 25 years from the year 1944. My friends used to call me No.1 ASS (A=Akbar, S=Sahib, S=Street). This is a joke from my side in return for your jokes.

    Rajaram Ramachandran, Juhu, Mumbai
    Nov 12, 2010

  9. J S Broca says:

    Dear Rajaram ji, thanks for your real life joke related to Abbreviations like the one I used (A 5 R 5).Yes, I was once invited to a function and it was clarified that the function was MBBS. I was an Engineer so I thought the function was not for me.Then someone explained to me : MBBS boley tau “Miyaan Bibi Bachchon Sahit” ie come with your husband/wife alongwith your children !! I also wonder why the spelling of this word ABBREVIATION (which means a short form) is so l-o-n-g !!

    J S Broca
    New Delhi

  10. J S Broca says:

    Dear Shernaz, many thanks for your lively response by adding one Rajnikanth-er to my list.Here is a hilarious death scene stealer from Ajit’s warehouse :Scene:Giving a decision as to how the hero should be killed. Ajeet: Peter, time bomb le aao aur is saale ko usse bandh do. Timer ko teek das bajhe set kar do. Nahin nahin, yeh saala to sub cheez hamesha late karta hai. Iska mauth bhi late hona chahiye. Timer ko panch minute late rakh do. Arre, Raabert, Raabert, bevkoof, silly fellow, time bomb ko yahan peh math rakho, yeh to ‘no-smoking’ area hai. Ha haa ha. Time bomb ‘tic tic tic tic’ karke bajega. Aur iska dil ‘tup tup tup’ karke dhatakega. Tum agar paas me khade hoge to tumko ‘tic tup tic tup tic tup’ suanaai dega”

    J S Broca
    new delhi

  11. g s p rao says:

    Exceptional stuff, Broca! Enjoyed.

    GSP Rao, Hyderabad
    Nov 15, 2010

  12. I’d like to say thanks for the time you took writing this article. You have been enlightening for me. I’ve forwarded this to one of my friends.

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