“Meri Bhains Ko….!”

Dear Readers,here is an interesting news item that caught my attention.By the way,it is from Bijapur.( Dr Pooja’s native place / home town ).
The news goes like this: A Headline:



BIJAPUR: This buffalo must have been taken aback when it heard a mobile ringing in its tummy.But not as much as the callers. There were seven missed calls ! This may not ring true. But this incident was reported from Hosarolli village of Bilagi taluka in Bagalkot district on Wednesday (25.02.09).

Farmer Ishwar Totager lost his mobile near his cowshed on Monday. He suspects it must have fallen off his shirt pocket while he was cleaning the shed. The mobile was packed in a plastic pouch and the buffalo must have swallowed the pouch. Totager forgot all about his phone. However, on Wednesday morning, he was surprised to find the pouch in the buffalo dung heap. The phone was not damaged as it had landed on the soft heap. What was more surprising was that the phone had recorded seven missed calls! No one knows what the callers heard. But the buffalo must have heard a ring every time a call was received. It must have wondered where the moo-sic was coming from.Going by the fact that Totager had set an old Kannada film number as his ring tone, the buffalo must have enjoyed the music!
My comments,views and take on this piece of news :

1.A LIMERICK :Here is the situation summed up in my limerick :

There was a buffalo in Hossaroli,
Who swallowed a mobile like a meethi goli,
After 7 missed calls were there,
It was found,u know, from where !,
That thankful farmer, from Hossaroli !!

(Perhaps,our Limerick Expert Gautamji, can improve upon this or write another one, but more funnier than mine )


One of the finest comedy songs (according to me) from Hindi Films is :”Meri Bhains Ko Danda Kyon Mara ” from Shakti Samanta’s 1970 hit movie titled “Pagla Kahin Ka” starring the inimitable Shammi Kapoor with Asha Parekh,alongwih Prem Chopra and Helen etc.The song was picturised in a mad house ( a pagal khana ) if I recall it correctly.It was sung by the versatile Manna Dey along with a chorus.The original song is not presently available on You Tube ( I tried hard ).However, readers can listen to it by going to the following link or copy pasting it:


The lyrics were by Hasrat Jaipuri and music by Shankar Jaikishan.It is a fun song guaranteed to lift up your mood.

If you search Google by typing “MERI BHAINS KO DANDA”you will get at least 7 videos of different types : animation,stage-show,a child dancing to the song,etc etc.See for yourself. E..n..j..o…y !!

I had translated the song into English,sometime in 1972 when I was studying in Fourth Year of Engineering  in M S University,Baroda, and had sung it on several occasions much to every one’s delight.I’ll post the lyrics and translation in near future,provided there is demand for it.The opening lines were: ” Why did you beat my buffalo ? It was grazing in the field,Of your father,What did it eat ? Why did you beat my buffalo ? ” 


The news item does not specify the make of the swallowed mobile-Was it a NOKIA,or SIEMEN, or MOTOROLA….? Had it been clarified,the makers might have used the incident for highlighting the tough survival qualities (?) of their mobile.It had passed the “Gut Test” after all.Perhaps Aamir Khan could have been used interestingly as a brand ambassador of the model / make to attract eyeballs and brand recall along with an animated buffalo or even a real Buffalo, in light of his recent 6 pack abs a la “Ghajini” !!. Marketeers,where are you ?

The story is also silent about the breed of the farmer’s buffalo.We in the Bank, have had some exposure to financing of buffaloes.The main breeds, if I recall on the basis of my discussions with our bank’s Agricultural Officers,are Murrah,Surti and Pandharpuri.The Murrah is extensively reared and found in hamara Punjab.It is said to yield the highest quantity of milk among all the breeds.Had the name of the breed been specified,there would have been a war of an agricultural or  veterinary kind,touting the superiority of one breed over the other.Murrah would perhaps pushed the mobile out in a day,while the Surti may have have expelled it in two,as against three days it took in the story.The farmer could have got his mobile back earlier.Think on this aspect.Meanwhile,readers with a serious bent of mind can see this slide show by Veterinary College Bangalore,giving a lot of useful information about buffalo breeds.Say  ” M,,,O,,,O,,,O ” to that and go to the following link which has around 42 slides:

5.MR YAMRAJ (God of Death ):

My knowledge of this guy is limited to the fact that his “vahan” (vehicle) is a he-buffalo ( Bhainsaa ! ) Many jokes , (though this guy needs to be taken seriously)      websites,funny poems are there about this gentleman (?)The best (his)story I recall from my childhood (told to me by my  late mom through one of her Gujarati friends in our neighborhood in Bulsar,Gujarat) pertains to this Mr. Yama.
It goes somewhat like this: History of Bhaiyya Dooj :The legends have that Lord Yamraj, the God of Death, visited his sister Yamuna on the ‘Shukla Paksha Dwitiya’ day in the Hindi month of ‘Kartik’. When Yamraj reached Yamuna’s home she welcomed Him by performing His aarti, applying ‘Tilak’ on His forehead and by putting a garland around His neck. Yamuna also cooked varieties of dishes and prepared lots of sweets for her brother and offered all those to Him. Lord Yamraj ate all those delicious dishes and when He was finished He showered blessings on Yamuna and gave her a boon as a gift that if a brother visits his sister on this day he would be blessed with health and wealth. This is why this day of Bhaiyya Dooj is also known by the name of ‘Yam-Dwitiya’.Thus it has become a tradition that on the day of Bhaiyya Dooj brothers visit their sisters’ home and offer them gifts. Sisters also make various dishes for their brothers and also give gifts to them.
I wonder if this is really true or just make belief ! Readers may please elighten me. No offence meant to any religion please ! ( Incidentally,we Sikhs don’t celebrate Bhaiyya Dooj )


One such movie I recall is “JHUK GAYA AASMAN “starring Rajendra Kumar and Saira Banu.Those who wish to know the story and see some beautiful pictures,please use the folowing link:

The story in brief : Sanjay (Rajendra Kumar) is a tourist guide.His best friend Hanuman Singh (Rajendranath) lives with him.Some girl tourists hire Sanjay to take them around Darjeeling. Their leader is Priya (Saira Banu), a wealthy girl from Calcutta.Sanjay falls in love with her at first sight.Their new-found bliss is short-lived, however. Priya has to return to Calcutta.Sanjay drops Priya to the airport for her flight home. On the way back, he sings the lovely “Kaun Hai Jo Sapnon Mein Aaya”song as he speeds along in his jeep.While rounding a corner he swerves to avoid an oncoming truck and is thrown from the jeep as it bounces down the steep mountain side.He dies.Special effects are worth seeing.He leaves his body and goes up there where he protests at his early death.Records are seen and it transpires that the Yama had indeed made a mistake.He ought not to have died.A solution to unite the lovers is found.There is a lot of suspense and comedy as his soul is transferred into another look alike body.To reveal the the end would be saying  moooo much. Will Priya ever be able to love Sanjay again? Watch Jhuk Gaya Aasman to find out. It’s a solidly heartwarming / funny entertainer! Go rent a CD from the neighbourhood supplier and see another roop of Yama.
On second thoughts,this poor Yama guy is on 24 X 7 X 365 duty and he doesn’t get rest or leave as people are always dying.
I also pity his poor vahan the Bhainsa ,who has to work overtime to transport his lord and master Yama,from Afghanistan to Zanzibar via Timbuktoo.!! 


Most of readers must be knowing  this sweet story.The oldest known version of the story of Savitri and Satyavan is found in “The Book of the Forest” of the Mahabharata.The story occurs as a multiple embedded narrative in the Mahabharata told by Markandeya. When Yudhisthira asks Markandeya whether there has ever been a woman whose devotion matched Draupadi’s, Markandeya replies by relating this story.Here too, if you read the story, Yama himself, riding on his Bhainsaa,comes to claim the soul of dead Satyavan. Savitri follows Yama as he carries the soul away. When he tries to convince her to turn back, she offers successive formulas of wisdom.Ultimately there is a happy ending to this story.Go to the following link if you are interested :
Dear Readers, I could go on and on,but before I say good bye, I’ll make a reference to some proverbs in Hindi / other languages related to the subject :
The Buffalo ! ( BHAINS)
1.” Bhains key aagey been bajaavey,bhains khadi paguraavey “.
( “Been” is a musical instrument used by snake charmers )
Meaning :The buffalo busily chews the cud,ignoring the been being played to it. 
2. “Akkal Baddi ki Bhains ?” ( Need I explain it ? You all are very intelligent .) 
3. “Bhains aagad Bhagwat !” (Gujarati) Meaning :Reading a holy book before a buffalo is a waste.
4. ‘Jiss ki laathi,uss ki Bhains ! ” ( Might is Right )
I am sure there are similar / equivalent proverbs in other Indian languages as well.
Ruminate over them while I chew this cud and think about the next instalment of this piece :THE PATNA CONNECTION, ” TAKKI WAALA AAYA”, CHILHOOD PRANKS,FATSOs , etc. etc.  

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10 Responses to “Meri Bhains Ko….!”

  1. Dr Pooja G Bhuyar says:

    Jitoo Uncle,
    Kis mitti ka bana hai vo bhains. I am totally surprised. Well,I din’t know about this happening.I wish there could be an interview with Mr Totager on some TV channel and I wish I could see that bhains. Hats off to that sturdy mobile which din’t get digested ! Oops, 7 missed calls? Upon that a ring tone playing an old kannada number? I hope the bhains must have learnt the tune by now..Free time main, bhains vo dhun gunguna raha hoga..I am writing a song on this context which should be sung in the tune of Chura ke dil mera goriya chali…It goes like this……Hosarolli main kal ghantiya baji, Totagar ka khoya hua mobile mila, Bhains ne saat missed calls suni…..Jitoo uncle, sing this song in that tune. I am sure you will enjoy it. Wah ! Kya bhains hai ! !….Keep posting more… Best wishes.

  2. J S Broca says:

    Dear Pooja, Thanks for your appreciation and the lively feedback. Why don’t you track down that farmer and take his interview along with a photograph of his priced buffalo and send it to say “Aaj Tak” channel under “BREAKING NEWS”? I am sure with your soft skills as a doctor you will get out the best from that farmer.

    J S Broca, New Delhi
    Mar 23, 2009

  3. Gautam Nadkarni says:

    Dear Jatinder jee, Here is a limerick written by me about the buffalo who swallowed the mobile phone. The words and names have been deliberately misspelt for the right pronunciation: (You need to know Hindi though to appreciate the limerick). Here it is:

    There was a buffalo named Soli,

    Who lived in the town, Hosaroli;

    When she swallowed a phone,

    And got calls (said the tone):

    Ab poocho kis bhaasha mein boli?

    Gautam Nadkarni, Mumbai
    Mar 23, 2009

  4. J S Broca says:

    Dear Gautamji,

    A good one.You surely know how to win friends and influence people through your spontaneous creativity. Thanks.

    J S Broca
    24TH March 2009

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