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FROM FILMS TO FINANCE and more…

FROM FILMS TO FINANCE and more… 

Film buffs like me are all aware that the dialogues from the film “Sholay” (1975) are very famous even till today. Ramesh Sippy’s legendary movie was an epitome of classic dialogues. Till date every Sholay fan is well aware about each of its fantastic dialogues. Listed below are a few of them:

Thakur: Gabbar se keh dena ki Ramgarh waalon ne paagal kutton ke saamne roti daalna band kar diya hai…

Jai: Tumhara naam kya hai Basanti?

Jai: Mujhe to sabhi police waale ek jaise nazar aate hain.

Imaam: Itna sannata kyon hai bhai?

Thakur: Loha abhi garam hai, maar do hathoda.

Gabbar: Bahut yarana lagta hai…

Gabbar: Jab tak tere pair challenge,iski saans chalegi.

Basanti: Bhaaaag Dhanno bhaag aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai.

Gabbar: Yeh Ramgarh wale apni chokariyon ko kaun chakki ka aatta khilate hain?

Gabbar: Duniya ki kissi jail ki deewar itnee pakki nahi ki Gabbar ko bees baras rakh sake.

Gabbar: Jo darr gaya samjho marr gaya!

Veeru: Basanti, In kutto ke samne mat nachna.

Basanti: Yunki, ye kaun bola?

Gabbar: Kitne adami thhe?

Basanti: Ab dekhne waali baat ye hai ki taanga kaun chala raha hai…?

Jai: Saala nautanki, ghadi ghadi drama karta hai

Gabbar: Woh do thhe aur tum teen, phir bhi waapas aagaye… khaali haath. Kya samaz kar aaye thhe? Sardar bahot kush hoga? Sabaasi dega?

Kaalia: Sardar,maine aapka namak khaya hai ?

Gabbar:To ab goli khaa…

Veeru: SUCIIDEEEEE…

Jailor: Aadhe idhar jaao, aadhe udhar jaao, baaki mere peeche aao.

Thakur: Yeh hath hath nehin,phansi ka fanda! 

Now let’s say cut and come to 2011’s hit and award-winning movie : The Dirty Picture. I feel that like yester years Sholay dialogues, the The Dirty Picture dialogues given here, are also among the best dialogues in Bollywood films in recent times. Full credit must go to the dialogue writer of The Dirty Picture, Rajat Aroraa (who wrote Once Upon a Time in Mumbai dialogues too) The lines were intelligent, saucy, street-smart and creative. In effect, some people have said that Rajat Aroraa is the real hero of The Dirty Picture and Vidya Balan, is the main female lead. I don’t think any film writer has got this sort of compliment ever before. Don’t you agree? Here is a random list of dialogues collected from several sources:

THE DIRTY PICTURE DIALOGUE LIST

• Kuch to baat hai mere me aise jo usne 20 rupaye diye.

• Mujhe to chadhi zehar ki tarah ki ab pani bhi peeta hu to aag lag jati hain.

• Kya re tujhe holi khelne ka bahot showk hai magar suna hain ki teri pichkari mein dum nahin.

• Mere dil me til hai aur jis cheez par tum baithti ho uspar bhi til hai.

• Popcorn jitna bhi ud le girna use bartan par hi hain.

• Heroine ki zindagi is like an elected government, 5 saal tak party, usey baad support.

• Woh item number ki guitar thi aur main sufi ka ik taara..boss woh star thi, aur mera toh taara hi doobgaya.

• Har aadmi ke liye ek aurat hain, agar ussey bach gaye toh samjo zindagi bach gayee.

• Jab devi ki darshan ho gayee toh mandir kiss kaam ka.

• Aur tumhara naam keedey das, kyonki silk toh keedey se banta hai.

• Tumne 500 ladkiyon ke saath tuning ki hain, toh kya tumne kabhi ek ladki ke saath 500 baar tuning ki hain?

• Public saaman dekhti hain, dukaan nahin aur jab sharafat ka naqaab hattha hai toh sabse jyada mazza sharifon ko hi aata hai.

• Emraan Hashmi to Vidya Balan- you are fire from hell.

Vidya Balan – Tum usko bhi bonfire samaj kar haath senk logey.

• Ladka ladki miltey hain, kiss karke chale jaate hain,aur main to inhii chezzo sai badnaam hu.

• Jab zindagi ek baar mili hai to doosri baar kyun  sochein.

• Kuch logon ka naam unke kaam se hota hain, mera badnaam hokar hua hai.

• Tere chahne wale haina aage ki 4 rows main baithey hain aur pecche ki 40 rows meri hain.

• Aur main  yeh sabit kardunga ki film aise logo ki wajh sai nahi chalti hai.

• Naseeruddin Shah to Vidya Balan -Yeh plastic dekh rahi ho? Agar yeh plastic ho ya na ho, issey cigarette ko koi farak nahin padtha.

Vidya balan – lekin agar ismein baarish gir jaaye toh phir cigarette kiss kaam ka?

• Filmein sirf teen cheezon ke wajah se chalti hain, entertainment, entertainment, entertainment.. aur main entertainment hoon.

• Taarif mein gaali dey rahey ho ya gaali mein tareef kar rahey ho?

• Usko family do, behen do, izzat do aur phir loot lo.

• Main Silk hoon, Silk koi film nahin ki interval ke baad badal jaon.

• Silk toh upar bhi Aafat Macha Rahi Hogi.

• Dudh nikla to Amul ban gaya par sala us gai (cow) ko koi nahin jaanta jisne woh dudh diya hai. 

Some more: 

Q: Tumein kabhi pyaar hua hai? A: Pyar jo bisttar taak le jai? Haan.. Pyar jo neendh udade? Naan..

Tumhari batton main itna horsepower hai ki ghodon ka dimaag chalne lagta hai aur insaanon ka kharaab ho jata hai….dimaag.

Kuch logon ka naam unke kaam se hota hain, mera badnaam hokar hua hai.

Dikhana wohi chahiye jo log dekhna chahate hain.

Border pe khade hoke gaana nahi gaate.

Jawani taste ki jati hai waste nahin.

Public kahin aur khujlana chahthi hai, par tum uska dimaag khujlaane ko keh rahe ho…

Uperwale ne hume neeche itna sab diya hai kyun  na hum thoda thoda baant lein?

Galath kehtey hai log ki sirf dil tootata hai, body ka har part tootata hai! 

Vidya Balan’s dialogues from THE DIRTY PICTURE, are now very much in common use. The following is one of such famous dialogues:

“Filmein sirf teen cheezon ke wajah se chalti hain, entertainment, entertainment, entertainment.. aur main entertainment hoon”.

Here is a recent example from a media report:

Finance gets filmy..

Business Standard / Mar 28, 2012

At a recent conference organized by the group, Financial Technologies Chairman Jignesh Shah had taken a special liking to the famous dialogue from a Vidya Balan movie. In speech after speech, he improvised on the dialogue.

First in an evening session, he said for business, there are three important ingredients. They are enterprise, enterprise and enterprise.

Then in another session on the financial markets, he said markets run because of three important things — liquidity, liquidity and liquidity. 

Jai Ho! And they say films are not true to life…!! Or vice-versa? Stretching the use of the above filmi dialogue to our every day life situations, I can think of the following uses:

1. For an Entrepreneur to succeed in his venture, he needs three things: marketing, marketing, marketing.

2. For achieving success in life, three things are important:sweat, sweat, sweat.

3. For a woman to become an efficient home-maker, she needs to do just three things: slog, slog, slog.

4. For becoming a famous poet, you need three inputs:imagination, imagination, imagination.

You can use your imagination now to think of many more situations of this type. An example: I love three South Indian Snacks/dishes: masaala dosa, masaala dosa. masaala dosa!

BTW, do you know that there are three ways to respond to this posting too? Yes, by saying : hats off, hats off, hats off !

 

Learning lessons from Sachin…

Learning lessons from Sachin..

After Sachin created his recent record of 100 centuries, there have been many articles in the media about the lessons we can learn from him. Very soon, we will hear that IIMs and other B-Schools, have made case studies on him, for classroom discussions amongst the students.So, here is an attempt to list out some of the important lessons, from his life, for the benefit of my students, based on media reports and my readings.

Most players come as rookies, show their talents and skills, have their ups and downs and after performing consistently well over many years they are termed as legends by the critics and the media, but the case of Sachin Tendulkar, is unique. Right from the first time he burst on the cricketing scene as a 16-year old, everybody knew this boy was someone special and there was something legendary about him. And the way he has been performing over the last 22 years, he has left all those expectations behind and has risen tall among legends themselves.

As a cricketer, and as a person, there are many lessons to be learnt from Sachin Tendulkar. Some of them are listed here -below.

1. Being Humble

No one has ever heard this Mumbai boy boasting about his record breaking accomplishments. He has the most runs in both forms of the game, the most centuries in both tests and ODIs, the maximum man of the match awards, the highest ODI score and numerous other records to his name. He is called GOD in India. He has been called the world’s best batsman continuously over the last 15 years, and Sir Donald Bradman saw himself in his batting. Perhaps there is no one else in world cricket today who can take all this praise with the grace and humility that he embodies. Carrying the expectations of a billion people, and constantly improving the benchmarks he sets for himself has been his hallmark. When asked about being termed a GOD, he humbly says, “I don’t think it is possible for anyone to become GOD”. Still the same smile and enthusiasm!

2. Always being a Student

Despite having all the records to his name, and after consistently performing well for the last 20+ years, he is still a student of the game. He believes that there is always room for improvement. He says he is always keen to improve his game and wants to focus on the next game rather than celebrating his records and achievements. The same holds true for life too, as we must strive to be its students always and take whatever lessons and learning life has to offer, daily.

3. Doing Continuous Hard Work

He is one man in the team who many would argue doesn’t need to practice. But still he is the one who always works very hard before every series and match. He is always punctual in team practice sessions and makes sure to practice more before an important series. His asking leg spinners to bowl in the rough outside leg stump to prepare for Shane Warne before the 2001 series is well known. He has never sat on his laurels but always looks to work hard on his technique and fitness, and that is the reason why he is still one of the fittest players at 38 years of age. Enjoy life like he enjoys cricket.

4. Having a never ending hunger of the game

“I am happy with my performance, but not satisfied”, he has said many a times. This, too after having almost all batting records, to his name. His hunger for the game is something which makes his game worth watching. He still has the same smile as he had as a 16 year kid when he plays the game. He still considers every game important and the joy on his face after winning a match or scoring a century tells of his never ending hunger. The hunger to keep scoring runs, to keep his fans happy, and to prolong the misery of the opposition bowlers. If we all live our lives with the same hunger, there would not be anything which is not possible.

5. Being Disciplined

His greatest talent is not to pick up a ball early or hit it through the gaps, but to do it consistently for over 20 years, and constantly improving the standards which he himself has set for the world. His discipline in the nets is well known, where he sometimes bats even after the younger players wind up. Tendulkar shows that talent without discipline is useless. His preparation before every game, and his decision-making at crucial times as a batsman, is for all to see and marvel at. And when everybody else calls him a perfectionist at many shots, he is continuously improving at them for the last two decades with enormous hard work and discipline.

I would like to add some more lessons:

6. Believing that:” Nothing is impossible to achieve”.

That’s what his 100th ton tells us.

 7.Staying Focused.

A career that’s more than 22 years long with 188 tests and 463 one-day matches, is an indication enough of his phenomenal concentration levels.

8. Doing what you enjoy doing.

That’s his answer when he’s asked about the magic which drives him to strive for excellence and perfection in cricket-and that happens to be the secret of his success too.

9. Changing and adapting.

A man who has been playing test cricket for years, he manages to put up sizzling scores in 20-20 matches too.

10. Taking criticism in one’s stride.

He remains unfazed when the media and even some senior cricketers question his form and call for his retirement.

11. Understanding that :” Practice makes a man perfect”.

He keeps this in mind while following a practice regimen.

12. Believing that :”When the going gets tough, the tough get going”.

A couple of rough patches and even serious health issues did not bog him down.

13. Never letting success get to your head. 

He has remained level-headed and down to earth in a game that is all about money and glamour.

14. Keeping your cool.

There have been controversies, wrong calls from the umpire, but he has never thrown a tantrum.

Another sidelight of Sachin’s career now is that his Brand Value has gone up considerably, and we will soon see him advertising for and endorsing more brands aggressively. But, that will be another interesting story.

BTW, I am also now waiting to read similar articles and reports about learning some lessons from Virat Kohli’s life and cricketing career!

A Love Lorn Lass’ Lament….

A Love Lorn Lass’ Lament….

Here is a poem dedicated to a dear friend of mine….No names ! No names !

When I gaze into your eyes ,

I feel as if I am in a make believe paradise!

You call out my name in happiness sublime…

Breathlessly,I yearn to make you mine…

I dream, encompassed in your arms,

Feeling your breath on my neck, dear

The warmth of your lips on my cheek,

And our hearts beating as one-so near ! 

Why this fear of losing you

When you are not even mine?

And yet, you have my heart today

Which I had preserved and never given away….

Let me seal these moments of bliss,

Pour my soul into you with a kiss, my dove

And dream away …

falling, falling,falling into the oasis of LOVE….

  

CORPORATE LESSONS -4

CORPORATE LESSONS -4

Rohit woke up one fine morning with a huge hangover. He forced himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sat down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Rohit looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!”

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Rohit asks,”Son, what happened last night?” His son says, “Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door”. Totally confused, Rohit asks, “So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!” His son replies, “Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said, “Hey ! Leave me alone! I’m married!”

Moral:

Breakfast Rs. 100.00

Self-induced hangover Rs. 2000.00

Broken furniture Rs. 20,000.00

Saying The Right Thing While Drunk – PRICELESS!

  

 

CORPORATE LESSONS-3

CORPORATE LESSONS-3

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and their manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.

The Genie says, “ll give each of you just one wish.”

“Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk. I want to be in the Bahamas,driving a speedboat, without a care in the a world.”  Poof! Shes gone.

‘Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep.”I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.”Poof! Hes gone.

“OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says,
“I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story:

Always let your boss have the first say.

Category:  One Comment

Veritas bitterness ….

Veritas bitterness…..

A few days ago,I had read an interesting editorial in the Financial Express of 3rd March 2012 titled “VERITAS CURAT” on certain financial mismanagement in DLF.

Here is the link to the article for those who would like to read the same:http://www.financialexpress.com/news/fe-editorial-veritas-curat/919386/0

In response to the above,I had written a LETTERS TO THE EDITOR . My letter has been published in FE of 9th March 2012.

Here is what my letter says :

Letters to the editor

 Posted: Friday, Mar 09, 2012  
: Veritas bitterness
Apropos of the editorial “Veritas curat” (FE, March 3), the DLF management has termed Veritas’ report as “mischievous”. It is not clear on what basis DLF made that sweeping statement, without spelling out the reasons why Veritas needs to be naughty in the first place. Did Veritas have any personal interest or conflicts with DLF, for exposing the chinks in DLF’s armour? That fundamental question remains unanswered. It is well known that Veritas is Canada’s largest, trusted and most followed independent equity research firm, which has been used by investors and regulators, and is respected and accepted by the courts, since it is judged to write objective fundamental research reports, which all concerned can rely on. Their research reports are based on and prepared after thorough considerations of all aspects of a company’s financial reporting, disclosures, business-model, etc, with a view to guide investors and public while making important investment decisions, by using what is commonly termed as “forensic accounting” approach involving a careful understanding of all financial information provided by a company. So, when DLF accuses Veritas, it should understand that when you point your finger at someone, three fingers are pointing back at you. Let DLF make a bold effort to let the truth be known, if it wants to win back the public’s trust, instead of showing signs of indigestion, as truth is always bitter.
JS Broca, New Delhi
Your comments and feedback will be appreciated.
 
Category:  One Comment

CORPORATE LESSONS-2

CORPORATE LESSONS -2

Continuing after my earlier  posting  titled Lesson : 1 , here is the next lesson.

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,” Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”

Moral of the story:

If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.
 

CORPORATE LESSONS -I

CORPORATE LESSONS -I

While teaching as a Visiting Faculty in a few BBA and MBA Colleges in Delhi, I try to make my sessions interesting, by sharing some stories from my stock, collected over the years, from various sources. The idea is to make learning fun, since I am of the firm belief that what one learns in a humorous way, one seldom forgets in life. I now intend to share a few such stories with the obvious morals attached to them, with my students, readers and colleagues from the Bank and my other well wishers.

Here is the first story:

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says:” l will give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks:” Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor”, she replies. “Great!” the husband says: “Did he say anything about the $800, he owes me?” 

Moral of the story:

If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure. 

BTW, this story is the USAversion. I have already posted it earlier in the form of more popular Santa Banta brand of humor on my blog. Here is the link : http://seeingwithc.org/jsblog/?p=1793

 

Keep smiling…..