Archive for » July, 2011 «

Statutory Warning !

FACE BOOK ADDICTION

You are addicted to FB when..
 
You refer to Facebook affectionately as FB
You think that complaining or creating groups will actually bring about a change.
You join a new facebook group on a daily basis
You Search this website if you have a similar symptoms.
You have to log-in to your facebook account just to message someone that’s sitting less than 20 feet away from you in the other room.
You need to login to tell someone in your household how much you love them.
You go to your neighbour with a pen and write “you look awsome!” all over his wall, and then later call him and say that you have just written on his wall.
The first thing you do when you get up in the morning isn’t brushing your teeth, it’s getting on facebook to see if there’s any recent posts or to update your status.
You check your Facebook from the toilet.
You change your status at least 5 times a day.
You get all excited every time you get an e-mail alert on you cell phone hoping that it might be a message on facebook.
Your dreams involve people writing messages on your wall.
Your lonely boyfriend broke up with you by posting a comment on your facebook page.
Your profile has so man applications that it takes several minutes to load.
SO FRIENDS,A STATUTORY WARNING : DON’T BE ADDICTED TO FACEBOOK

 

Albert Einstein’s Equation…

Albert Einstein’s Equation. 

The other day,I heard a speaker in an HR Seminar,talking about the secret of his success.

He said that he was a great believer of Albert Einstein’s Equation which goes thus : 

S = X + Y + Z  

where, S = Success in life

                 X = Work

                 Y = Play

                 Z = Keeping your mouth shut. 

I liked the equation but surprisingly,I had never heard about it. 

Only equation I could recall was the famous equation of Einstein, ie         

                    E = m c square. 

Well,the most difficult part of the new equation is about keeping my mouth shut. 

I have tried it ( keeping my mouth shut I mean) but have had little success. 

Do send / share your responses / experiences. 

Keep Smiling !

 

 

Category: Ideas, People  6 Comments

I am now a pizza guy….

I am now a pizza guy….

Yesterday,I happened to pass by a pizza joint and could not resist the urge to enter it and order one.While I waited for my pizza (it was evening rush hour),I scribbled my thoughts on the borders of a take-away menu pamphlet.Here is my effort.Seems childish,but they say at 63,one becomes child-like again.Savour its delicious simplicity and spread the aroma,if you like it…..!! 

I am now a pizza guy….

 

With fast food culture spreading,

With shortage of time for elaborate cooking,

With ease of telephonic ordering,Hi !

I have now become a pizza guy …...

 

Regular circular,square or heart shaped fun,

With toppings of cheese,onions or capsicums,

Its friendly warmth is always welcome,Oh boy !

I have now become a pizza guy…..

 

My sleepy tastebuds wake up going ting-a-ling,

My appetite,hunger pains make my tummy spin,

I treat myself,wishing bread,paratha,roti a bye !  

I have now become a pizza guy…..

 

Pizza joints now here,there and everywhere,

Screaming banners,offering heavenly yummy fare,

Men or women,kids or elders,all can now for a pizza die,

I have now become a pizza guy….. 

 

By the time my pizza had arrived (in about 20 minutes or so) I had completed the above four verses.I had to stop there to enjoy my pizza-hot and sizzling !!

 

Try composing a poem when you visit a pizza parlour next time and are waiting for your order to be fulfilled. 

 

 

New Course,New University…

New Course,New University…

Here is an ad for a new course from a new university.Admissions assured 100%.Job Placements ensured 100%. Desirous candidates may apply immediately !!

  


National Corruption Institute Of India ( N C I I )

Affiliated To Both Houses Of Indian Parliament

Listed on the World Corruption Index as the World’s Best C-School Invites Applications for 3 Years Undergraduate Bachelors Degree in Corruption. (BDC)

Earn your BDC from the World’s Most Reputed Institute for Corruption Studies

OUR COMPREHENSIVE SYLLABUS INCLUDES:

Financial Theory and Practice
Transfer of funds through HAWAALA for creation of MASS GHOTALA

  • FINANCIAL NETWORKING -Movement of money through well engineered networks between State Party Units and Central Party Unit.

  • Solicitation methods to increase donations towards Party Fund.

  • Theory and application of Popular BRIBE concepts and methods like Chai Pani, Parcel, Change, Gift Box , Color TV, Foreign Trip and the ever popular Children’s School Fees

Public Relations (PR) and Media Management

Learn how to be MISQUOTED BY THE MEDIA.

Learn to say the right things to be QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT.

Excellent training in PARTY SPOKESMANOLOGY .

Learn how to argue on TV with other Party people on TV like Professor Manish Tewari and Professor Ravi Shankar Prasad.

Develop public gestures like NAMASTE and HAND WAVING.

Learn the art of proving all allegations as BASELESS AND POLITICALLY MOTIVATED.

Effectively refute STING OPERATIONS. Advanced course in proving that VIDEO FOOTAGE IS FALSE AND MANIPULATED.

Law and Order Module:

In this module you will learn how to:

Commit MURDER and RAPE

Bring LOCAL POLICE under your control

Get BAIL super fast if you are ever arrested.

 Apply and get speedy ANTICIPATORY BAIL so you do not  get arrested in the first place!

FIGHT ELECTIONS FROM JAIL! Special lectures by visiting Professors Shahbuddin and Pappu Yadav!

Advanced Riotology

 Methods to build your own storage houses for HOCKEY STICKS AND WEAPONS to engineer riots.

 Identify and develop your own fuel depots for easy and widespread dispersal of RIOT FRIENDLY PETROL TANKERS

Form effective partnerships with local liquor stores for easy procurement of DESI DARU to get rioters high and ensure awesome rioting!

Full study in CONTEMPORARY BUS BURNING. New age exciting methods for INSTANTANEOUS BUS COMBUSTION.

 Introductory Kashmir method of inciting riots through STONE THROWING.

Actual rioting demonstrations under the expert tutelage of Professor Pravin Togadia.

Gain Extensive Knowledge From Our Faculty Of

World class Professors.

Special Courses In:

“2G SPECTRUM” “ A Telecommunications Perspective” By Professor Andimuthu Raja

‘’Flat Taking From Army Jawan’’ By Professor Ashok Chavan

‘’The Correct Standard of Clean’’ By Professor Lalit Bhanot

‘’Sports Medal or No Medal, In Corruption Always Get Gold Medal’’ By Professor Suresh Kalmadi

“Application of Corruption on Non Human Species “ Stealing Money for Cattle Fodder” By Professor Laloo Prasad Yadav

 

“Building A Corridor For The Taj Mahal Can Cost More Money Than Building The Taj Mahal Itself” By Professor Mayawati Kumari.

...And Many Many More..!!

SO FORGET ALL B-SCHOOLS, BE COOL, JOIN

THE C-SCHOOL…

NCII IS THE BEST. 

Taxing Times…

Taxing Times...  


It is time again to file our Income Tax returns.

I cannot refrain from posting a funny little poem I had read in my college days.

.

Here it goes:  

A  Funny Poem on Taxes !

Tax his land, tax his wage,
Tax his bed in which he lays.
Tax his tractor, tax his mule,
Teach him taxes is the rule. 

Tax his cow, tax his goat,
Tax his pants, tax his coat.
Tax his ties, tax his shirts,
Tax his work, tax his dirt.

Tax his chew, tax his smoke,
Teach him taxes are no joke.
Tax his car, tax his grass,
Tax the roads he must pass.

Tax his food, tax his drink,
Tax him if he tries to think.
Tax his sodas, tax his beers,
If he cries, tax his tears.

Tax his bills, tax his gas,
Tax his notes, tax his cash.
Tax him good and let him know
That after taxes, he has no dough.

If he hollers, tax him more,
Tax him until he’s good and sore.
Tax his coffin, tax his grave,
Tax the sod in which he lays.

Put these words upon his tomb,
“Taxes drove me to my doom!”
And when he’s gone, we won’t relax,
We’ll still be after the inheritance tax !!

 

Wish you all the best in these taxing times ! 

Future of Bt brinjal…

Future of Bt brinjal….

There was a very interesting article on the captioned subject matter in Financial Express of  14th JULY 2011. Here is the link to the article :

http://www.financialexpress.com/news/column-future-of-bt-brinjal/817290/0

In response to the above article, I had posted some comments on FE’s website.My comments are now seen live just below the article which can be read by clicking on the above link. 

 

Here is what is displayed on FE’s website : 

Comments

» Bt Brinjal Posted by J S BROCA on 2011-07-19 07:48:28.618682+05:30 

Dear Sir, This refers to the column titled :”Future of Bt Brinjal” by Robert Wager in FE of 14th July 2011,higlighting the pros and cons of this controversial issue.Some researchers claim that Bt Brinjal is safe for human consumption.Others warn against its toxicity.While some vouch that our farmers will harvest more profits from its cultivation,as it happened in case of Bt cotton,others and especially the eNGOs,have sounded a note of caution on Bt related foods.The proof of the pudding lies in eating,it is said.To prove that Bt Brinjal is indeed safe for humans,let all concerned ministeries make and serve various dishes made from Bt Brinjal at all official lunches,dinners and meetings and at all marriages of their kith and kin and then publish the results to show that Bt Brinjal is indeed safe.Practise before you preach.Then,let ads of Bt Brinjal Brand Ambassadors loudly proclaim:” Look Ma,no side effects of Bt Brinjal !” If need be,make it mandatory to serve Bt Baigan Ka Bhartha,Bt Baigan Ki Subzi,Bt Baigan Ki Cutlets and Bt Baigan Ki Soup at all cultural meets of foreign visitors to India.Parliament House Canteen can also include such dishes in its menu.Sanjeev Kapoor of Khaana Khazana fame and of Food Food TV Channel can be roped in to promote Bt Brinjal.Innovations in food products need innovative marketting techniques.After all,it is a question of to Bt or not to Bt.

J S BROCA

NEW DELHI

——————————————————————————————————————————————

YOUR RESPONSES WOULD BE WELCOMED.

Enjoy your Brinjal dishes,until Bt Brinjal matter is finalized. 

   

Having posted the above piece yesterday ie 19th July 2011,to my surprise,a highly edited version of my letter has been published in today’s (20th July 2011) FE containing words that I did not write.They have chopped out the humourous part and literally fed Bt Brinjal words into my mouth .See the letter for yourself and compare what is there on FE’s website and what is published in the letters to the editor column today ! Thats Creative Journalism for you ! Ha ! Ha!

Letters to the editor

The Financial Express

Wednesday, Jul 20, 2011  

: To Bt or not to Bt …  Apropos of the column “Future of Bt brinjal” (FE, July 14) by Robert Wager highlighting the pros and cons of this controversial issue, some researchers claim that Bt brinjal is safe for human consumption, while others warn against its toxicity. While some vouch that our farmers will harvest more profits from its cultivation, as happened in the case of Bt cotton, others, especially the eNGOs, have sounded a note of caution on Bt-related foods. It must be mentioned that, although science is clearly on the side of commercialisation of Bt brinjal, the politics of GM crops in India is anything but clear. When we all know, and science has proved, that reduced pesticide sprays, increased yields and healthier food are all well documented outcomes from Bt crop technology, what’s making the government not act is difficult to understand. For the government, it seems, it is still a question of to Bt or not to Bt.

JS Broca ,New Delhi

Delivered hot and sizzling…!

Delivered hot and sizzling…!


 


There was an interesting editorial titled :”DELIVERED” in FE of 7th July 2011. It spoke about the excellent performance of Domin’os franchisee M/s Jubilant Foodworks in India.To read the article,please go to the following link :


http://www.financialexpress.com/news/delivered/813813/0


I liked the piece a lot since I had recently discussed a CASE STUDY on a Pizza related subject in one of my MBA classes.


Here is what I wrote to the Editor in response by way of a letter as usual :


Dear Sir,


This refers to your Editorial titled :”Delivered” in FE of 07th July 2011 on the marketting success story about Jubilant Foodworks,the sole franchisee of Domino’s Pizza.Indeed,within a short span,Jubilant has captured the tastebuds,tummies and hearts of Pizza loving Indians,with its Indiansied recipes and flavours such as ” Keema Dopiazza” or “Peppy Paneer”.In fact the company has several reasons to be really jubilant. It began with 100% imports but today it has zero imports.A touch of “swadeshi” you can say ! Overcoming the initial hiccups,it has made “Domino’s” a household name.Pizzas have now reached the masses in India.With its shrewd strategies,it has left its rivals like McDonalds,Pizza Hut and Subway,far behind.The number of Indian towns where Dominos has outlets has now escalated to 87.Domino’s total number of outlets now are reportedly 364 compared to 211 of McDonalds.Thats Pizza Power indeed.It soon plans to tap the “sweet tooth” sector of Indians by launching doughnuts.Its Garlic Bread,Choco Lava Cake,Pasta and Wraps have also created a big buzz.It is note worthy that out of a total  Rs.1000 crores Pizza market,Jubilant has garnered a share of 50% already.Domino’s success story has already become a Case Study in the hallowed portals  of several B Schools.Its much touted and famous marketting gimmick :”Delivery in 30 minutes or Pizza free” has become an enviable standard for others to emulate. 


J S BROCANEW DELHI.  


My response has so far not been published in FE perhaps because  my letter was judged to be too sugary and in praise of the Pizza company in question !!


Anyway,it was a delicious subject, and I have shared a slice of my views on it with my readers. Do you agree ? Your feedback will be quite tasty,I bet.


 


 

Work Place-Madhuvan or Kurukshetra?

Work Place-Madhuvan or Kurukshetra?

In a recent article in The Economic Times,I happened to read about how to make one’s work place comfortable.Here is the piece :

 


Workplaces can be like Madhuvan, but they are more often Kurukshetras.



8 Jul, 2011

 

Devdutt Pattanaik

 

ECONOMIC TIMES

 

The story of Krishna can be divided into two parts: the Bhagavata part and the Mahabharata part. The first part is where he is in Madhuvan, playing the flute, drawing the milkmaids to dance with him outside the village, at night, in the forest. It is a place that is not governed by fear, or rules, or obligation, yet everything is synchronized to form a perfect circle.

The second part is where he is in Kurukshetra, riding a chariot, leading warriors to a bloodbath. It is a place of fear and rules and obligations and vendetta, where all rules of decency collapse.

Every employee who joins an organisation, hopes it to be Madhuvan: a place of joy and hope and growth and teamwork. Every employee who is leaving an organization describes the situation as Kurukshetra: a place of struggle and politics and insensitivity. We want our worlds to be governed by the principles of Bhagavata, but we are often faced with the terrible ways of the Mahabharata.

In a large company of seventy thousand people, Milind found his team of seven people always groaning and complaining and being nasty about everyone and everything from the management to the customer. As a young team leader, he felt he was in the heat of a Kurukshetra battle every day. He realized that every organization had the same grouses with the management, with the admin, with the customer, with teammates. This is how most organizations were, even those who claimed very publicly to be employee-friendly.

Maybe, he realised, this is how every employee sees an organization and everyone expects the world around him to transform. Who established Madhuvan and Kurukshetra? Does Krishna create these spaces or these spaces create Krishna? Are we fountainheads of circumstances or victims of circumstances?

Milind decided he had enough of the ‘issues’. Every day he would focus on what was positive in both professional and personal life. No negative conversations allowed, except on Tuesdays – which he called ‘vent-day’. Every day Milind would only discuss positive things. When there was a problem, the focus was on solutions. When there was a complaint, the focus was on resolution. He encouraged his team to do the same. They agreed reluctantly.

On Tuesday, Milind wore a black shirt and the day was spent only complaining and whining and in bouts of intense irritation. It took getting used to but in a few weeks, Milind’s team was a happier team, all organizations issues notwithstanding. Milind took a stand: he would transform his little world into Madhuvan.

He realized the importance of the chariot festival of Jaggannath Puri where devotees pull the giant chariots hoping to bring Krishna back from Kurukshetra to Madhuvan. The point is to discover that only we, on our own, can close the Mahabharata chapter in our life and open the pages of the Bhagavata. If we wait for management to do it, we may be waiting for a long, very long, time.

[Devdutt Pattanaik is the Chief Belief Officer of the Future Group who can reached at devdutt@devdutt.com]


 

On reading the above article,this is what I had commented on the paper’s website :

 



I believe that a workplace like a Kurukshetra can be converted to one like a Madhuvan by change of our attitude.

Efforts need to be made in right earnest to make the working environment conducive for result oriented performance.
Here are some tips given by various HR experts on this subject and which I have found to be really worth implementing during my entire working experience of nearly 36 years-7 years in an Engineering Company and 29 years in a Bank:


1.It’s the environment that shapes performance.
2.Have clear goals that inspire.
3.Share all information.
4.Make everyone business literate.
5.Map perceptions regularly. 
6.Get rid of status symbols.
7.Foster innovation.
8.Have fun – often.
9.Share the rewards.
10.Everyone is a leader.

Just ponder of the issue and let me know your views.

My comment is still to go live on the website.I will let you know if it goes live.

 


Don’t carry CSR overboard…

DON’T CARRY CSR OVERBOARD

There was a thought provoking article in Financial Express dated 30th June 2011,titled “Don’t carry CSR overboard”.

  

To read the article on the site of FE,go to the following link:

http://www.financialexpress.com/news/column-dont-carry-csr-overboard/810520/0

I really liked the article and this was my response to the Editor,by way of a letter :

Dear  Sir,

  

This refers to the column”Don’t carry CSR overboard” by Madan Sabnavis in FE of 30th June 2011.

 

In the Indian context,there is a popular belief that donation should be done “gupt” (secretly) or anonymously if one is expecting to be rewarded for this charitable act by divine forces. 

 

Further, there is a famous doha of Saint Kabir : “Chidi Chonch Bhar Ley Gayi,Nadi Naan Ghatiyo Neer,Daan Deeye Dhan Naan Ghatey,Keh Gaye Bhakt Kabir..”

 

Literally,it means that it hardly matters if a sparrow takes a beakful of water from a river.Similarly,your wealth is not going to be seriously affected if you donate a small portion out of it.

 

In simple words,if a bird drinks from the river,the river does not lose any water. Saint Kabir says that similarly,wealth is never reduced by donating/using wealth for benefit of others ie God always provides to people who use their wealth to help others.
J S BROCA

New Delhi

If you have any views/comments/opinions on this subject,do submit.

  

Here is a link to a beautiful rendition of Dohas of Saint Kabir by JAGJIT SINGH…on Youtube…E..N..J..O…Y…!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qc72lpEc3kc

Reverse Brain Drain…

Reverse Brain Drain…

Recently,there was an interesting news item in Financial Express (FE) of  27th June 2011.It was titled :”NRIs head home, MNCs spoilt for choice.”

To read the piece directly on website of FE,please go to the following link:

http://www.financialexpress.com/news/nris-head-home-mncs-spoilt-for-choice/809257/0

On reading the article,I had sent my views on the subject matter to the Editor of FE,by way of a letter.

 This is what I had written to the Editor :


Dear Sir,

 

This refers to your article titled : “NRIs head home…” (FE 27th June 2011).

 

It appears that a fresh wave of Reverse Brain Drain has started.The reasons are attributed to :a) recent economic growth in India and b) many good opportunities opening up in various sectors.Also,many US MNCs have opened their offices here in India and so have started hiring more NRIs to target the growing markets. 

  

Reverse Brain Drain is commonly believed to be because of a logical outcome of a calculated strategy, where NRIs accumulate savings  and develop skills overseas that can be finally used in their home country.

 

It also occurs when scientists/engineers/other intellectuals migrate to a lesser developed country to study in its elite universities,do research and gain practical experience in areas where education and employment opportunities are limited in their own home countries.These professionals finally flock back to their home country after years of experience and either start as entrepreneurs,work as faculties in a university, or work for MNCs in their home country.

 

In addition to above,some other reasons for the migration of Indian highly skilled work force is due to their desire to return to their roots,enjoy a more family-oriented lifestyle, and to some extent, for security concerns in the post 9/11 period where many Asian Indians have been discriminated against because they are often mistaken for Arabs.
 
Recently,there has also been a different type of reverse brain drain as well.M
any second-generation Indians are now coming back to the country.So, reverse brain drain is no longer limited to the commonly perceived migration from a developed to a developing country by a first generation Indian. Many of the world’s top multinational companies are beginning to send their top Indian minds to head their companies in India.As a result,when we lose some,we win many back as well.This augurs well for the brains as well as for the countries.How long this wave will last is anybody’s guess. Let both parties enjoy the fruits of this change,meanwhile.

 

J S BROCA

New Delhi. 

Well,today’s issue of FE has published an abridged version of my letter reading as under :



Letters to the editor


The Financial Express

Saturday, Jul 02, 2011 





: Reverse brain drainApropos of the news item “NRIs head home, MNCs spoilt for choice” (FE, June 27), a fresh wave of reverse brain drain has started. The reasons are attributed to economic growth in India and good opportunities opening up in various sectors. Also, many US MNCs have opened their offices in India and so have started hiring more NRIs to target the growing markets. Reverse brain drain is commonly believed to occur because of the logical outcome of a calculated strategy, where NRIs accumulate savings and develop skills overseas that can be finally used in their home country.

It also occurs when scientists/engineers/other intellectuals migrate to developed countries to study in elite universities, do research and gain practical experience in areas where education and employment opportunities are limited in their home countries. These professionals finally flock back to their home country after years of experience and contribute to its growth. Recently, there has been a different type of reverse brain drain. Many second-generation Indians are coming back to the country. So, reverse brain drain is no longer limited to the commonly perceived migration from a developed to a developing country by a first generation Indian.

JS Broca, New Delhi

Your views/responses will be appreciated.