Following news item appeared in FE on 21.10.09:
Column : Liril minus its girl
Posted: Tuesday, Oct 20, 2009

“Made Humpty Dumpty happy again.”
Labour MP Tom Harris watched the show – called Something Special – with his sons aged three and five. He said: “For goodness sake. Kids should be exposed to real life a bit, not cosseted away.
“We need to stop this moronic activity. “Let them see colourful and violent cartoons, and let them be children.” The Glasgow South MP said he had also seen Little Miss Muffet changed on the channel so she made friends with the spider rather than fled. Language expert Lynne Truss accused the Beeb of trying to shield children from real emotions. She added: “I was terrified by all these things when I was a child and it didn’t do me harm.” And chairman of The Campaign for Real Education Nick Seaton said: “Nursery rhymes are a gentle way to ease children into the real world. “Children are being told everything is rosy and aren’t being raised to confront problems.” But a BBC spokeswoman said: “The small change to Humpty Dumpty was for no other reason than being creative and entertaining.”
Following news item was published in the Financial Express of 11th Oct 2009 :
GLOBAL CAREERS
Freshly painted, the neon-lit sign beckoned;
In walked a pretty college girl, seemingly prudent.
The chap at the counter she seriously addressed:
“Tell me now about your schemes for students.”
Queried the chap: “Your destination…?”
“Oxford, Harvard, Paris or any other station.”
“And your weight, if you please?”
Bemused, she replied, “59 kaygees!”
Said the chap, looking very glum:
“We need a full truckload, minimum!”
“What nonsense are you talking …?
Adjust me alone, or out I am walking…!”
“Miss, I am just a poor helper boy,
I do what my owner tells me to do…”
“Ah! Here’s my master, now,
Ask him: what and why and how to!”
Asks the owner: “How can I help you Miss..?”
“I wanna go abroad to study if you plizz!
This guy here is asking weird questions!
He never should be in public relations!”
The owner looks at her first with concern,
And then at the sign-board, in turn;
Instantly aware of the comical situation,
He guffaws much to the girl’s consternation!
“Miss, I am really very very sorry!
My guy’s job here is to book a lorry,
Ours is a transportation fleet,
Education is not up our street!
“The painter, poor guy, bless his soul,
Is an uneducated, rustic old fool…
What you read here as “CAREERS”
Was meant to be painted as “CARRIERS “!!
said the store-wallah: welcome n hi !
what would you like to have sir ? said he to me
do you have biscuits for dogs? said me,
said he: yes sir, but pray do clarify:
will you eat them here, or carry them,bhai ?
when you wear a your white salwar and kameez,
you look like an ambulance, my dear fiancee,
but there is only one difference my darling, which is very clear
while an ambulance carries the injured and dying, for care
you walk away,injuring onlookers with your beautiful killing looks,and airs !
i loved you with all my heart,my dear Reeta,
but your father thrashed me nearly to death,my dear Reeta,
had i committed a sin in loving you, my dear Reeta ?
what was the cause of his thrashing me,dear Reeta ?
then suddenly,i remembered my trigonometry rules,dear Reeta,
that sine theta by cos theta equals tan theta,my dear Reeta.
i have now decided not to ever love you again,dear Reeta,
for i cannot bear another thrashing,dear Reeta
and i don’t wish to revise trigono rules,dear Reeta !!
By Rassool Jibraeel Snyman, Oct 05, 2009 Tomorrow What if there’s no tomorrow What if there is no sunrise Or birdsong Or laughter Or tears What if there’s no tomorrow. Here is my response to it :
I liked the following poem posted in Muse by Rassool ji :
Poetry
South Africa, rassool1@mjvn.co.za
My l-o-n-g response:
1) I was reminded of the song with the title :” If tomorrow never comes” by Garth Brooks, (1989) which won a popular award in 1991 I think.So many other things can happen, if tomorrow never comes.Here are the lyrics of that great song. I am sure you will enjoy it !
Oh tomorrow never, never comes
Oh tomorrow never comes
Now you tell me that you love me, oh
But tomorrow never comes
Many weeks now have I waited
Oh many long nights have I cried
But just to see that happy morning, happy morning
When I have you right by my side
But tomorrow will never come, oh no, no
Tomorrow never gonna come
Now you tell me that you love me
But tomorrow never, never comes
So tomorrow I’ll be leaving
Yes tomorrow I’ll be gone
But tomorrow you’ll be weeping, oh
But tomorrow will never, never come
Well tomorrow will never, never come
Oh no, tomorrow ain’t never gonna come
Yeah, yeah, you tell me, you tell me
That you love me, but tomorrow never comes .
Haste gate jahan se guzar
Duniya ki tu parvah na kar
Muskuraate hue din bitana
Yahan kal kya ho kis ney jaana
Maut aani hai ayegi ek din
Jaan jaani hai jayegi ek din
Aisi baaton se kya ghabrana
Yahan kal kya ho kis ney jaana
Na Chemistry Hoti,Na Main Student Hota
Author: Jatinder Pal Singh Broca Oct 30Sundar thi naak uss ki test tube jaisi.
Saanson main ester ki khushboo bhi sath thi.
Bin piye hi ho jata hai alcohol ka khumar.
Andhere main hota tha radium ka aabhas.
Kuch is tarah love ka production hua.
Nucleus ke chaaron taraf electron hon jaise.
Jab uss key daddy sey hamara introduction hua.
Ignesium tube main jaise sodium bhadak uthey.
Aur humm chup rahey benzaldehyde ka kadwa ghoont pee kar.
Aur lab main hamarey dil ke siwa kuchch jalta na tha.
Aur humm firtey hain awara hydrogen ki tarah…..