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People who live in glass houses… Author: Jatinder Pal Singh Broca Sep 02

People who live in glass houses….

Old proverb ..new versions

There is a famous proverb which goes thus :” People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.”

What is the literal meaning of this proverb ? This is actually a warning against hypocrisy. Before you go accusing someone of some wrong doing, make sure that you are not guilty as well because your accusation could come back and get you.

Now you will wonder why this question today ? Well yesterday I saw the old movie “Waqt” (1965) The famous actor Raj Kumar had a lovely role in it.The senior readers like me, must be aware that Raj Kumar had a unique style of dialogue delivery; very stylish in his own way and unmatchable which went on to become his trademark. Apart from his unique style of dialogue delivery, he was known for his show or scene stealing abilities. He has delivered some of very few memorable and famous dialogues in Bollywood. He is no more with us but will always be remembered for his roles and his deep voice.

Now, if you recall, one of Raj Kumar’s famous dialogue from the movie was :” Chinoy Seth..Jinke apne ghar sheeshe ke hon woh doosron par paththar nahi phenka karte..”

I tried to put the above dialogue in a proper form :“Chinoy Seth,sheeshey key gharon mein rehne waaley doosron par paththar nahin fenka kartey…”

This set me thinking as to whether our perceptions change over a period of time.(It is now 45 years since that “Waqt” dialogue first became a rage)

I asked some of my friends to come out with better and funnier versions. Here are some of their responses :

1. People who live in glass houses should not throw parties !

2. People who live in glass houses must dress in the basement !

3. Glass breaks very easily. So they should make houses from plexiglass. People who live in plexi glass houses, will probably get away with throwing stones to their heart’s content.

4. A glass house may be beautiful to live in, but there are other transparent materials that are stronger than glass.

5. A song from a Hindi movie goes thus :

“Sheesha ho ya dil ho, Aakhir toot jaata hai !

Lab tak aate aate haathon sey sagar chchoot jaata hai !

Sheesha ho ya dil ho, Aakhir toot jaata hai ! “

So it is clear that people should not live in glass houses.

6. The way it was explained to me by my late father, this means, don’t go throwing stones at other people’s houses ,because if they retaliate in kind, your house will be very easily destroyed too. The non-literal meaning, is that whatever you use against other people can easily be used against you, so be careful how you treat others in order to avoid consequences.

Dear readers, I would love to have your take on this proverb-and the funnier, the better !

By the way, Raj Kumar’s other famous dialogue from “Waqt” was :”Yeh bachchon ke khelney kee cheez nahin,haath katt jaayey tau khoon bhi nikal aata hai.”

I hope you remember what he was referring to when he said :”Yeh” ? A knife. But more of that- later!

E..n..j..o..y…

Category: Humour, Social Commentry | 2 Comments

It’s a matter of time… Author: Jatinder Pal Singh Broca Aug 28

It’s a matter of time….

I was discussing the concept of time management with some of the MBA students in one of my classes recently.Time is money.Time and tide waits for no man etc. We also discussed how technology changes with time and how things change with time too.In a lighter vein, I narrated the following three humorous situations:

Waqt waqt ki baat…..

1. Kavi ka waqt…

Ek kavi shaadi key baad biwi sey bola :

“Aaj sey tum hee meri kavita* ho,kalpna* ho, bhavna* ho..”

Patni bolee :” Merey liyey bhi aaj sey aap hee merey

Dinesh ho,Rohit ho,Raakesh ho..”!!

(* in Hindi, these are popular names of girls too )

Translation :

A Poet’s time….

A poet , just after his marriage, said to his wife :

“From today,you alone are my poetry,my imagination,my feelings …”

Replied the wife :”For me too,from today,you are

My Dinesh, my Rohit, my Raakesh …” !!

2.Hanumaan ji ka waqt…

“Bhagwaan,abb main dharti par nahin reh saktaa.”

“Kyoon nahin reh saktey?”

“Pehley log lait karr maathaa tektey ththey,

Firr thoda samay jaaney ke baad,

Keval jhuk karr tekney laggey

Main firr bhi kush thaa !

Lekin abb tau ghor kallyug aa gaya hai !

Aaj mandir mein ek 22 saal ki ladki aayi

Aur haath hilla karr boli–’ Hai Hanu !’ “

Translation :

Lord Hanuman’s time….

Said Lord Hanuman to God,

“I can’t stay on this earth any more”

“Why” asked God very calmly.

“God,earlier,devotees used to prostrate

Before me and offer their respects.

A few years later, they just bowed their head

And offered their respects,

But I was still happy…

However,now, times are so bad.

You know God,what happened this morning?

A girl of 22 walked up to my idol in the temple,

Just waved her hand at me and said :

‘ Hi Hanu ‘ ”!!

3.Bhikhaari ka waqt…

Bhikhaari bola mujh sey,

“Saheb 10 rupaey dey do,

Mobile re-charge karr key

Girl friend ko phone karna hai.”

Main bola:”Wah,Bhikhaari

Nein bhi girl friend banai hai..”

Bhikhaari bola:”Nahin Saheb

Girl friend nein hee

Bhikhaari banaya hai ! “

Translation :

A Beggar’s Time…

Said a beggar to me one day:

“Sir, give me ten rupees, I pray.

I have to get my mobile re-charged

And talk to my girl friend.”

Astonished,this is what, I uttered :

“A Beggar too has a girl friend these days.”

In turn,the beggar thus muttered :

“No Sir,my girl friend has

Turned me into a beggar…!”

E..n..j…o…y…!!

Category: Heritage, People, Social Commentry | 4 Comments

Human interest story… Author: Jatinder Pal Singh Broca Aug 27

I read the following story in a news paper this morning. I sent it to one of my friends –a great poetess and she instantly came out with a beautiful poem on this issue. I am posting the story and the poem for you dear readers. I hope you will love them. Happy Reading…

MIRACLE MOM CUDDLES BABY BACK TO LIFE

Doctors declared Jamie Ogg dead but his mother Kate just did not give up on him. This is her story.
AN AUSTRALIAN mother has told how her touch brought her ‘ dead’ baby back to life at a hospital in Sydney.
Doctors gave tiny Jamie Ogg no chance of survival when he was born prematurely at 27 weeks weighing just 2lb, or just under 1kg.His twin sister Emily had survived but after battling for 20 minutes to get him to breathe Jamie was declared dead.

He was then handed to his mother Kate so she and her husband David could grieve and say their goodbyes.But after two hours of being spoken to, touched, cuddled and held by his mother, he miraculously began showing signs of life. Then, after being given breast milk on his mother’s finger, he began breathing regularly.
Kate, who gave birth after a three- hour labour in March, has spoken of how vital ‘ skin- on- skin’ care can be for a sick baby, or ‘ kangaroo touch’ as it is known in Australia. ‘ Skin- on- skin’ care is when the child is laid on the mother.
Normally, premature babies are sent to intensive care and she was only given her son to hold because he was thought to have died.

Telling how the drama unfolded at a hospital in Sydney, she said,

“ The doctor asked me after the birth had we chosen a name for our son. I said, ‘ Jamie’, and he turned around with my son already wrapped up and said, ‘ We’ve lost Jamie, he didn’t make it, sorry’.” “ It was the worse feeling I’ve ever felt. I unwrapped Jamie from his blanket. He was very limp. His little arms and legs were just falling down away from his body.
“ I took my gown off and arranged him on my chest with his head over my arm and just held him. He wasn’t moving at all and we just started talking to him. We told him what his name was and that he had a sister.
We told him the things we wanted to do with him throughout his life,” said Kate.
Jamie occasionally gasped for air, which doctors said was a reflex action. She added: “ After just five minutes I felt him move as if he were startled, then he started gasping more and more regularly.

“ I thought, ‘ Oh my God, what’s going on?’ A short time later he opened his eyes. It was a miracle. I told my mum, who was there, that he was still alive.Then he held out his hand and grabbed my finger,” said Kate about the magical moment.Then Jamie opened his eyes and moved his head from side to side.
Kate said a message was passed on to their doctor insisting the baby was showing signs of life, but he sent back a midwife with the reply that they were just natural reflexes and that there was no possible way he could still be alive.
Kate then said to her husband, “ What if he lives?” She added: “ I was like, ‘We could be the luckiest parents in the world’.” She gave Jamie some breast milk on her finger. He took it and started regular breathing. “ At that point the doctor came back. He got a stethoscope, listened to Jamie’s chest and just kept shaking his head. He said, ‘ I don’t believe it, I don’t believe it’.” David,
speaking to the Australian TV show Today Tonight , said, “ Luckily, I’ve got a very strong, very smart wife. She instinctively did what she did. If she hadn’t have done that, then Jamie probably wouldn’t be here.” The doctor who delivered Jamie refused to be interviewed for the TV show.

(From Mail Today 27th Aug 2010)

Now here is the poem :

Poetry
Shernaz Wadia, Aug 27, 2010
Pune, shernazwadia@aparnaonline.com

Drama In A Sydney Hospital

(Based on a news report from Mail Today, Aug 27, 2010, sent by J. S. Broca)

“Have you decided on a name for your son?”

‘Jamie’, said Kate joy brimming from her eyes

She held out her arms to hold her premie baby

Swathed and bundled in the doctor’s hands.

‘We’ve lost Jamie, he didn’t make it, sorry.

You may say your goodbyes to him now’.

The sparkle replaced by disbelief

Kate slowly undid the swaddling cloth

Stared achingly – dangling limbs, lifeless head -

Was her precious baby really dead?

She held him against her bare chest,

Skin to skin, the tiny head on her arm

“Sweetheart, I am your mother.

Dad and I have named you Jamie.

You know you have a twin sister too

And we have great dreams for you.

Wake up, little one, to fulfill those dreams”

Jamie occasionally gasped for air,

But the doctor brushed it off -

“A natural reflex. He just can’t be alive”

The mother’s heart believed otherwise.

For two hours she held him close,

Cuddled him and persistently talked to him.

Gasping again, to his parents’ delight

The miracle baby stretched his tiny hand,

Grasped his mother’s finger, opened his eyes

And moved his head from side to side!

The doctor thought he knew better,

Said these signs didn’t matter!

“He just can’t be alive.”

From her breast on to her finger

Kate took a drop of life-saving elixir

Hopefully fed it to her miracle boy

He took it! And began to breathe steadily!

The doctor listened with his stethoscope

Shook his head in stunned surprise

and said repeatedly

‘I don’t believe it, I don’t believe it’.

How could he not?

This was the marvelous power

of a mother’s healing touch!

Category: Comments to print media, People, Social Commentry | 4 Comments

My favourite funny poem… Author: Jatinder Pal Singh Broca Aug 25

My favourite funny poem

I have already mentioned earlier on this forum about my love for funny poems and limericks etc.Sometime in 1991-1992,when I was posted in my bank’s Zonal Office in Chandigarh,I used to find some time to visit the famous T S Central Library located nearby in Sector-17.My search for limericks and funny poetry had continued un-abated since 1967 and onwards.Whenever I happened to come across such stuff,I used to note it down on a piece of paper and later copy it neatly in an exercise note book. I still have some note books preserved from that era.

Gradually,I fell in love with EDWARD LEAR ( Born 12th May 1812,Died 29th Jan 1888) a writer,who popularized limericks & nonsense poetry.Incidentally, his birthday is now celebrated as ” Limerick Day”.

Sometime in 1867 (133 years ago) his famous piece of nonsense titled “The Owl and The Pussy Cat” was published.It was reportedly written to regale the children of his patron.Among his other famous works were :” A Book of Nonsense ” (1846) and “The History of the Seven Families of Lake Pipple-Popple” (1865)

When I read the poem “The Owl and the Pussy Cat” for the first time,I was fascinated by Lear’s simple words,musical setting and the use of certain words-both real and imaginary to carry the readers into the realm of fantasy and pure unadulterated mirth.

Even after almost 20 years since I first read it, it remains etched in my memory.I have read it umpteen number of times and every time it makes me smile and forget the problems of my daily life.Truly,the humour of Lear’s poems has proved to be irrefutably timeless.

So, my dear Readers,even if you have heard of it or read it earlier,I cannot refrain from posting the poem in its entirety from my collection.Perhaps,today’s younger generation of budding poets and poetesses may get inspired to write such funny poems to tickle the readers who like their daily peg of humour undiluted.

The Owl and the Pussycat

The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
‘O lovely Pussy! O Pussy my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are !’

Pussy said to the Owl, ‘You elegant fowl!
How charmingly sweet you sing!
O let us be married! too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?’
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the Bong-tree grows
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood
With a ring at the end of his nose,
His nose,
His nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.

‘Dear pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling
Your ring?’ Said the Piggy, ‘I will.’
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.

E…N…J…O…Y….!!

Category: Humour, Nostalgia, Social Commentry | 5 Comments

Santo’s cookery diary… Author: Jatinder Pal Singh Broca Aug 17

Santo’s Cookery Diary

I hope most of the readers are aware of some famous and lovable cartoon characters like Santa,Banta,Santo ( Santa’s better half) and Banto ( Banta’s equally better half ) etc.

I believe that there are two categories of women.One category of women is who don’t know how to cook but will cook.The other of course is the category: who know how to cook but won’t ever cook !

Read this piece and decide for yourself as to which category our Santo belongs !

Long ago I had read an article about a dumb blonde (incidentally, all blondes are said to be dumb !) ( Dumb-for the un-iniated,means five feet barometer with vacuum at the top,and not those who can’t speak !) The blonde always tried to cook but she was always a natural disaster.

The same analogy has been punjabi-cised here ( if I can use that word !)

Here is what Santo scribbled in her diary (which was stealthily discovered from her kitchen cabinet by my friendly neighbourhood detective who has a fine nose for punjabi kitchen flavours as well as good detecting abilities !)

Monday:
It’s fun to cook for Santa. Today I made an angel cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbours-Channo,Shanno,Jeeto and Preeto-all were kind enough to loan me some extra bowls.

Tuesday:
Santa wanted a fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise you know, when Santa brought Banta,a friend of his,home for supper !!

Wednesday:
A good day for a rice dish. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed a bit silly but,I took a leisurely bath. I can’t say it improved the rice to any extent.

Thursday:
Today Santa asked for vegetable salad.I tried a new recipe today. It said prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving.I followed the recipe but when Santa came home a bit early he caught me in the act of tossing.That is what led Santa asking me why I was rolling around in the garden !.

Friday:
I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put all ingredients in bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

Saturday:
Santa did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday.For some reason Santa keeps counting to ten.

Sunday:
Santa’s folks were coming to dinner. I wanted to serve a roast. All I could find was a burger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the burger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out a burger, much to my disappointment.

Good Night Dear Diary. This has been a very exciting week. I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Santa. If we could just get a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a Chocolate Moose.See you next week same place same time.Happy cooking till then !

Category: Humour, People, Social Commentry | 3 Comments

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